One of the most important ways of transportation in Hawaii is the new Aloha Double Decker Bus. This bus has been booming every since this company started. The AlohaBus has stops at Waikiki/ Ala Moana stops, Diamond Head stops, Pearl Harbor stops, and the Waikele Express. Even though the AlohaBus hasn’t been here for long the tourists love the riding on the bus and waving “hi” to other people. Tour buses play an important role in the tourism business. The AlohaBus really help tourists get to know the island better and better understand Hawaii's culture and history; also many people get to enjoy Hawaii's great weather and scenery.
Another way of transportation is the taxi. One of the most popular taxi companies in Hawaii is TheCAB. TheCAB is positioned as Hawaii’s largest fleet of taxis; it provides island-wide service 24 hours a day, 365 days a year. Their mission is to provide the best, demand-responsive taxi service to our island and the State’s visitors. I’m guessing over 2,000 people probably go on TheCAB each month. TheCAB really helps in the transportation business because it helps bring people around the island to different places they don't even know how to get to.
Traffic is a big concern here in Hawaii mainly because more and more people from different states and other countries come here. Right now the government is thinking about how to fix the problem of having too much traffic, and the solution is the Rail Transit. The Rail might help a lot with the traffic problem but it is also a big money problem. The government has to pay over 3.7 billion dollars to build it. Another issue is that people might not use to buses or trolleys (for tourists) anymore because everyone would probably want to ride the Rail. But an upside is that the Rail might bring in more tourists to our island. Also it might help bring in more money so we can repay the $3.7 billion. There are some upsides to it and some down sides but this will also help with the transportation of people all around the island.
Many people in Hawaii have different ways of transportation. It could be your car, the bus, a cab, and etc. But I think tourists have it the best, they get to explore our island the best way; on unique buses like the trolley, the AlohaBus, or another different kind of transportation. Hawaii gets a lot of money from the transportation business because people from different states or countries don't know where a place is or how to get there, they always have to find a way to get to their destination.
You need to discuss transportation more than just two type of ways of getting around (double decker bus and taxi can be placed into one category "tourist transportation"). You should try to discuss another angle of transportation, maybe the effects of so many tourists on the road or how transportation benefits the state aside from helping tourists get around (need facts). Also you need to discuss each topic more indepth,for example explain exactly what the rail is don't assume the readers knows what your talking about. MS(3-)
ReplyDeleteWatch for sentence breaks where there should be a comma. One example is in the middle of the second paragraph. "Even though the AlohaBus hasn't been here for long the tourists love the riding on the bus..." There should be a comma right after the word long. Also, you don't need the extra "the" after love. Overall, I really liked your rough draft.
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